I turned 64 today. I have learned something about myself and my life.

“You think you can do these things, Nemo, but you can’t. You just can’t”.

I have done virtually nothing this month, art-wise. I am paralyzed into disabling discouragement by our upcoming move. My physical health, like that of my DD28, has taken a nosedive.

The sad and bitter truth is, I like to think I can do these things, but I just can’t.


Barring acts of God, we are 22 days out from moving. DD28 has had no improvement in either the shoulder or the knee. She did go to the Urgent Care. They said rest and ice, take Tylenol or Motrin. I personally think she has a rotator cuff tear. Maybe not complete, like mine, but enough to sideline her for a time.

I just hired the movers. Yikes!! Looking at about $1,000, but we are long past a DIY move. The packing will be key. I have enough cat carriers, I know what will go in our survival kit, and I know who will be on-site.

Now for my confession: I have only packed 1 (one) box.

May the odds be always in our favor!

Let the games begin!!


Armistice Day commemorated the end of the Great War. It honored those who gave their lives in the War to End All Wars. No one at that point expected one generation later that they’d be fighting World War II.

Both of my parents served in WWII, my dad as an Airman, working with radios at Scott Field, and my mom as a WAC, I believe. I never heard her story.

In 1966-1967 I lived through the military take-over of the Democratic Republic of the Congo, the event that made it Zaire. I heard some stories, and knew that my folks’ best friend was a mercenary, but that was mostly outside of my sphere. What I did know was the 6 Day War. All of my friends were Jews, and all of them had family in Israel. We sat together, and prayed for victory, and for the family members to all be safe. God heard our prayers. He also made sure that my family was on the last plane out of Zaire.

I protested the Vietnam War. Went to Washington, and New Haven, marched on the Federal Building here. I felt as though we had made a difference, in making our voices heard.

20 years later, my views had changed. I gladly prayed for all those serving in the Gulf War. Many people I knew had someone involved. And then we moved.

I was living in West Virginia when the planes hit the towers. I ended up at a friend’s house, watching TV and praying. Fortunately, I didn’t lose anyone that day. But a nurse at the health clinic I went to, did. My family and I instinctively headed for our church to pray. New York seemed so faraway, and we felt so helpless. Many WV folks have a tradition of military service, and so it was a comforting place to be, surrounded by those who cherished this great nation and felt that serving was a privilege.

Memorial Day, which began as Decoration Day, after the Civil War/War Between the States/The War of Northern Aggression, is now the day we honor all those who died serving our country, all conflicts included.

Today we celebrate Veterans’ Day, honoring all of those who have served and are serving. Please take a moment today to thank a vet for his or her service, to thank a military family for the sacrifice they make, when they let their family member go. We sleep safely at night under the blanket of protection that they provide. Please pray for our veterans, for those currently serving, and for their families.

. . . and some days you’re the windshield.

You know how on most things in this world, from medications to weather forecasts, they say things like 2% chance of _________ ? Well, meet my beloved daughter, referred to here as DD28.

If there is a side effect on her meds, she gets it. If there is a chance of falling down stairs, she does. If you can hurt yourself trying to keep from falling, she will. She broke her big toe riding in a car. Sitting still!!

She’s pretty much stopped sleeping, despite her meds, which is probably from the stress. She is rarely hungry, a side effect of most of her meds. And the thoughts whirl through her mind at an incalculable rate, like Sylvester (CBS – Scorpion) trying to multiply out to the nth degree what the possible outcome of any particular sets of variables could be – always negatively. She goes around making sure that there are no pointy objects left out (because a cat could be impaled on one, and die before we could get help).

I tell you all this so you will understand what happened today. She fell on the concrete steps outside when she took the granddog out to do his business, injuring both her foot/ankle and her knee, which she used to break her fall. My husband went down, brought up the dog and went back to help her. They get inside the apartment, she reaches for the arm of her chair, and it rolls away from her, wrenching her shoulder severely.

And she had taken all of her ice packs to her boyfriend’s apartment.

She calls herself part of the, “2% Mom, 2%”. Always. She was the one child I had labor for. Ended up with an emergency C-section. The cord was wrapped around her neck. Twice.

Where does that leave us? With no ‘Staff’ to do my wound care, or help me give the cat her sub Q fluids, or prep dinner for us. Granted, only the leg is truly an issue.

More than that, I am worried sick about her. She refused to go to the Urgent Care, which may be okay since they can’t do much for sprains. But they can tell you if you’ve torn part of your rotator cuff.

The day after is always when things hurt most. She went home with her boyfriend, the granddog and the grandpewpie (a teacup chihuahua referred to often as her “kidney”, because she’s more like an appendage or organ than a dog). She won’t be leaving home anytime soon, and I sure hope the granddog sleeps all day. . .

Please pray that she’s just banged up, and not in need of surgery. Thanks.

I actually managed t0 do a bit of an AJ page in my small Moleskine, snap a photo with my phone, and then post it to Instagram!!

I also packed 2 boxes of my books, worked on the current catghan and had Grey’s running most of the day. Helped my productivity for sure. One thing that hasn’t helped are my glasses. My readers aren’t too bad, but my distance set just really do see distances. Unfortunately, there is nothing that bridges the gap between the two. I do have 30 days to do something about it, I’m just not sure what.

My art mojo is still among the missing.  I have to just blow that off, and believe that in the new home I will find it hidden in one of the boxes I unpack.

This means that I hope things will end well, despite all evidence to the contrary. DD28 is an Optimistic Pessimist. That means she hopes for the best but knows things will end badly. Do we need to discuss how often she is right? For example, my lack of a post yesterday, and the complete lack of art, save crocheting and coloring.

Our home will hopefully be completed on December 1, which means hopefully we can move in sometime during the 2nd week of December and there may not be a ramp on by then. And sn*w. Oh, and we are praying that the hitch is on my end of the home, otherwise I will continue to live in a cave, because the site is open to full sun on one end, and has a huge oak and some pines on the other.

Why such a delay?

Have I mentioned that we used to live in West Virginia? Yes, it IS almost Heaven. But. Everything shuts down the week of Thanksgiving so that folks can go hunting. All the schools. Because the bus drivers hunt. Do not misunderstand, I am aware of how important venison is to the freezers of WV.

“Apparently” the same is true of Pennsylvania. Because the mobile home factory shuts down for the week.

Can I tell you I burst into tears?

I despair, thinking of moving in bad weather.

See, we had planned this wonderful Thanksgiving where we would all be together. For the first time, since babies and marriages. And the first snafu just meant shifting things a few days. This is way past that.

We had hoped to celebrate several events together on the Sunday of my brother-in-law’s birthday. The Great and Powerful Bob almost left us last year, so we want to rejoice. But since we may not have even moved in by then, that’s out.

Christmas won’t work, because my kids have kids. I laid down the law when mine were young, kids need to be home for Christmas. Grandparents can be flexible, but try explaining to a four year old that they have to leave their gifts and go traveling. My granddaughter is an exception. Her father’s family live in Philly, so they travel. It is one of the few times of the year that she sees her other grandparents, and the cousins. Plus, I think she’s the first girl child in this generation. She has like a kazillion boy cousins.

So now we are looking at New Year’s Day.



Fives Are BAD!!

Sarah has long maintained that FIVES are bad. 5:55 on May 5, 2015, she was a wreck. There is some truth to what she says. However lately she has decided to “Punch 5 in the throat”.  Today FIVE punched back, and Sarah needs all the prayer she can get, as her mental state is quite fragile.

The complex management sent her a certified letter saying that the lease was valid, she signed it, and if she moves out now, they will hold her responsible for the rent thru the end of April!! She called the property manager. They could not reach an agreement; the PM said she was going to call their attorney, to see if we are right or not.

Well, nobody is gonna crap on MY daughter, so I called an attorney. He explained a few things and suggested some strategies. Hopefully none of this will come to pass. Please pray with me that the recommendation will be to just let us go.

Next, I had a voicemail from the office manager at the mobile home dealership. She wants to talk about the ramp and the move-in date and get the building permit signed. It would be amazing if she says they can move UP the date. I’m afraid that it will be pushed back. Our best option in that case would be to put our stuff in a pod and move into a hotel. ARGH!!!

I am continuing with my crochet; all the artspiration has left me. I cannot even journal.

Do what you can with what you have where you are. xoxo